Topic: Why is Baptism important?
Source of this posting: Moderator response
Date originally posted: January 24, 2003
Moderator who originally posted this source: Father Phillip
Question: As a protest against the Church's recent abuses, my sister and her husband (both Roman Catholic) have decided not to have their newborn baby baptized. Of course my parents, aunts, uncles, and I are all horrified. Is there any reason we can't just baptize the baby without the knowledge of the parents? I believe that if I place holy water on my thumb, and use it to make the Sign of the Cross three times on the baby's forehead, while saying, 'I baptize you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit', the child is baptized. This infant's soul is too important to leave in the hands of his parents' irrational whimsy. Thanks and God bless.LS
Answer:
Thank you, Lucille,
for your question.
Frankly, I am horrified by the abuses that have occurred in the Catholic Church
and which have been revealed recently. May God forgive us all!
So, I can certainly understand your sister and her husband's desire to show
their sense of horror over what they/we have found out in the last year or so
about child sexual abuse by clergy in the Catholic Church and by the way these
terrible acts have been mis-handled by so many of our Church's Bishops. The
fact that your sister and her husband want to make a "statement" is
perfectly understandable to me.
I do NOT, however, believe that withholding the Sacrament of Baptism from their
newborn child is the best way for them to make that statement. I hope and pray
that THEY will decide to baptize their child.
And I hope that they will find other, more appropriate, ways of making a legitimate
statement about what they feel as a result of the abuse scandal in the Church;
joining Voice of the Faithful, withholding financial support from certain aspects
of the Church's activities, writing letters to Church officials, and certainly
praying, fasting, and other spiritual exercises might be ways they could make
their horror known in constructive ways.
But, your question, Lucille, was the following, "Is there any reason we
can't just baptize the baby without the knowledge of the parents?"
The answer to your question is: YES indeed, there is plenty of reason that should
keep you from just baptizing the baby without the knowledge of the parents!
God entrusted the care and rearing of this child to your sister and to her husband
(who are, I presume, validly married). While you, your parents, aunts, and uncles,
may -- legitimately -- be "horrified" at your sister and her husband's
decision not to have their child baptized, God did NOT entrust the nurture and
rearing of this child to you, nor to your parents, nor to aunts and uncles.
God "loaned" this child to your sister and her husband. They are the
primary care-givers; they are the primary instructors in the faith.
While we may or may not agree with the way a child is being "formed,"
in most cases -- physical harm being excepted, we simply do NOT have the right
to interfere with what God has decided. And God clearly decided to let THIS
child be born to THESE parents at THIS time in the history of the Church. We
must respect that -- even if we don't like it.
If you were to baptize the child "without the knowledge of the parents,"
you would be substituting your opinion for God's opinion. Baptizing a child
against the stated will of the rightful and caring parents is a rather serious
example of "the ends justifying the means." And that's not a point-of-view
that we as Catholics support -- no matter how good the "ends" may
be.
Moreover, God's love for this child is real. While we certainly believe that
children -- all people, in fact -- should be baptized in the normal course of
things, God's love for a child does not depend on Baptism -- as holy and sacred
and important as Baptism truly is.
God loves this child; as the Scripture says, nothing can separate us from God's
love.
While I hope and pray that someday, your sister and her husband will decide
to let their child be baptized, I could NEVER support a decision to baptize
that child against the stated desire of the parents of this child. Who knows?
God's plan may be such that someday this child will seek to be baptized and
therein bring her/his parents back into relationship with the Church! We just
simply cannot over-ride what God has chosen to do because we don't like the
way it looks right now. With God, remember, all things are possible.
Before we leave this topic, Lucille, I want to encourage you to read what has
been written about Baptism in our CatholicQandA.org FAQ Library. Go to
http://64.246.202.66/FAQ_Library/faq_library.htm
and then under "Subjects" on the left side of the page, click "Other
Sacraments". On the right side of the page under "Topics", you
will then find a question that begins, "What is the process of Baptism
in the Catholic Church...?" Click on that question and see if might help
you to understand a bit more fully what the Church teaches about Baptism.
This child, by the way, is VERY BLESSED to have an aunt who cares so much; I
am sure you will be an excellent example of love, compassion, and fidelity to
the Lord and the Church for this baby.
God bless you!
Father Phillip