Topic: Purgatory and Marriage

Date originally posted: March 11, 2002

Source of this posting: Moderator response to emailed question

Moderator who originally posted this source: J. Ruffo

Question:  REGARDING YOUR ARTICLE ON PURGATORY: I WAS TAUGHT THAT PURGATURY WAS THE SAME AS HELL, EXCEPT THAT IT HAS AND END, WHEREAS HELL IS EVERLASTING. COULD YOU COMMENT ON THIS?  SECOND QUESTION:  REGARDING POTENTIAL MARRIAGE PARTNERS BEING OPEN TO THE POSSIBILITY OF HAVING CHILDREN, WHY DOES THE CHURCH THEN ALLOW MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE PAST CHILD BEARING YEARS TO MARRY SINCE THERE WOULD BE NO CHANCE OF CONCEPTION IN THESE CASES?  OR WHY WOULD THEY ALLOW A WOMAN SAY, IN HER LATE THIRTIES WHO HAD A HYSTERECTOMY TO MARRY, SINCE THERE IS NO CHANCE FOR PROCREATION IN THAT CASE EITHER? I HOPE THESE QUESTIONS DON'T SOUND DUMB. IT'S JUST THAT I SOMETIMES WONDER ABOUT THESE THINGS. THANKS FOR YOUR PATIENT UNDERSTANDING. THIS IS A GREAT WEBSITE! KEEP UP THE EXCELLENT WORK!!!

Answer:

Dear Frank, 

No.  Purgatory is not the same as hell, only shorter.   

Purgatory is a temporary separation from our eternal existence with God when we make amends for past sins from our earth days.  We are still elated and bubbling with joy that we have made it this far!  Heaven is secure; hell is not possible for us.  We wait here in hope and joyful anticipation. 

Hell is permanent separation from the only Source of our fulfillment.  It’s a state of eternal frustration.  It does not end.  There is no possibility of escape.  Existence is eternally miserable.  Try to avoid this “place” at all costs.

 Regarding your second question about the Church’s requirement to be open to the possibility of having children to enter a valid marriage.  I once witnessed the marriage of a couple in their 70’s, well past their child-bearing years.  They were able to enter into a valid union in the eyes of the Church because they were open to the possibility of having children should their circumstances allow such.  Fact of the matter was that they were physically incapable of having children. 

I also have an aunt who had a hysterectomy when she was 12.  She could never have children.  Yet, she was able to enter into a valid Catholic Church marriage because she was open to the possibility of having children, even though she physically could not.  She did not choose not to have children (in fact she would have loved to have her own).  Although the age of 12 in our culture is way too young, she physically could have had children prior to the hysterectomy, which was beyond her control.  She didn’t do anything to avoid having children.  For her, and sadly so, it was nature taking its course, as in the happier case of the couple in their 70’s mentioned above. 

 Many people do not agree with the Church’s stance on this issue, especially here in affluent North America, but the Church’s position remains the same. 

Father John