Topic:  Is inter-racial dating and marriage ok?

Source of this posting: Moderator response

Date originally posted: November 23, 2003

Moderator who originally posted this source: Michael Chepul

Question:  I am 24 year old white female and I am dating a 24 year old black male. I think that my mother is not fond of inter-racial dating or marriages. However, her admitted complaint is that he is Baptist. She said she is disappointed in that. She says that different races cause problems in marriage. Different religions cause problems in marriage. My question for you is, is it ok for people of different races to date, marry, have children? is it ok for people of different religions to date,marry and have children? Thank you

Answer: 

Ginnifer,

I am very glad that you look to your parents as a source of wisdom in your life. The experience that they have gained in their lives can often give us knowledge that will allow us to live our lives as well as we can. It would seem to me that your mother could be right in her perspectives, at least to a degree.

Due to our own prejudices and those of our society today, there can be many problems for interracial couples who are married. There are issues that can come up between couples who are of different religious backgrounds as well. But no matter who you are there will always be problems in a marriage. A marriage is a union of two people. Two imperfect beings who make a commitment with each other and God, a commitment that lasts the rest of their lives.

It is important, however, to not become discouraged by this. God's love extends to every single person that lives on the Earth, and he desires that each of us be as happy as we possibly can. In order for us to acchieve this happiness however, we must listen to God's call for us. God can call just about anyone to marry whomever he wants. God can do anything God wants to! So, to answer your question simply, Yes, it is perfectly alright for people of different races and religions, who are called by God, to date, marry, and have children.

You should remember that God doesn't call everyone to marriage. We should all spend time with God, praying that we can discern his call to us in our lives; be it to marriage, religious life, or as a single lay person. Once you, or anyone else, feels that they are called to marriage, they should then pray about and with the person they want to marry. The Catholic Church normally has a one year or longer period of Marriage discernment and preparation to help couples figure who think that they might be called by God to marry each other.

I hope I have helped you here. The main thing to remember is that God loves all of us and can call all kinds of people to love each other and to marry, not just those of the same race and religion.